Mistress Eleise returns to Chez Bellatrix


February 23 to 28

I am pleased to report that My dear friend Mistress Eleise will be coming to visit Me at Chez Bellatrix again. She has just confirmed her dates and will be available with Me as a duo between February 23rd to 28th only. She informs Me that she is coming on these dates to celebrate her birthday in the French captial. So let’s make this a birthday for her to remember!

We are now taking respectful applications from prospective slaves and submissives.

Together we have been bruising male egos since 2013 and although our styles are very different, we compliment each other well. But this will be your last chance to serve us as a duo for a long time after this as she informs Me she will not be returning to Paris until July at the earliest.

Our tribute is 600 euros for one hour or 1000 for two hours.

A minimum of 24 hours notice will be required and a non refundable deposit is manatory.

We cater to a wide variety of interests and will respect boundaries, and we welcome new and returning patrons. However, if you have not met either of us before, to be considered, you must fill out this application form on My CONTACT page.

We look forward to meeting with our adoring Parisians.

Best wishes,

Lady Bellatrix

Model Hub – Unlimited Streaming 100+ videos for just $9.98/month


Unlimited Stream 100+ videos for just $9.98/month

Unlimited streaming of 100+ Femdom videos for just $9.98/month

By now I’m sure you have all heard of Porn Hub, however, they also have a subscription side to their platform called Model Hub. I have been a busy bee over the winter and I have now added over 100+ clips to my account.


As I am rather new to this platform, I am offering an introductory promotion for unlimited streaming of My growing collection of Femdom clips. As I have been a producer of Femdom content since 2012, I have amassed over 800 videos which I will slowly be adding as time goes on.

Some benefits to taking My trial offer:

– Unlimited streaming of 100+ Femdom videos for just $9.98/month
– An additional 15% off on all downloads
– DMs are open to all fan club members

Model Hub also allows the opportunity to order custom videos as well as the option to tip, so if you see something you like, you know what to do! But hurry, this introductory offer ends February 14th (because I’m romantic that way).

Check it out here:


I also have a few FREE videos on Porn Hub so if you’d like to “try before you buy” go check them out, comment and like!


In My usual quest for Global Domination, I am taking My Femdom fuckery mainstream. So, give it a whirl and let Me know what you think!

Best wishes from Paris,

Lady Bellatrix

Diary of a Paris Dominatrix

Diary of a Paris Dominatrix

As the end of the year draws to a close, I reflect on My time as the highest profile international Dominatrix in Paris. There have been more ups and downs than a roller coaster even for someone who doesn’t do anything in halves. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. On a personal level, I continue with My French studies every week and though My oral abilities are coming along nicely, it will be a while until I start blogging in My third language.

Over the last twelve months at Chez Bellatrix, besides the French poplulation, I have welcomed slaves from England, Spain, Dubai, Austria, America, Signapore and Denmark. This only solidifies My decision to cut down on touring. Why should I visit the world, when the world comes to Me! That’s not to say, of course, that I couldn’t be seduced to travel on My FLY ME TO YOU arrangement.

Which brings Me to My first point. I will be staying in Paris for the duration of the Christmas holidays. While the country has been crippled by transport strikes, protests and power outages, life must go on.


I wrote about My special Mistress for Christmas session + dinner date package in an earlier BLOG. So if you find yourself without someone special to be with or stranded in Paris, consider Me your kinky companion to celebrate the big day with. You will wine Me and dine Me then afterwards, I’ll take you back to Chez Bellatrix to for a night of festive Femdom GFE. I will enjoy upwrapping all the gifts you got Me, then to be served as only a Queen desesrves to be.

Please note: while I am available on Christmas day, it will ONLY be for the package deal and not for a same day basic session. And with a special Christmas package, comes a special tribute.



Social Media

If you haven’t heard by now, Twitter will be changing their Terms of Service (TOS) as of January 1st 2020 and they are tightening the noose on censorship. Those of you who have followed Me on social media for a while will notice that I got kicked off Instagram last summer and rarely post on Facebook. Since then, I have gone PG-13 on Twitter and no longer post XXX content whatsoever (and cleaned up My language – I no longer even say losers). So, there is a huge possibility that not only Me, but many of My colleagues will disappear without a trace in the new year.

Where will you be able to find Me if that happens?

AVN Stars is a new social media platform created by established industry giants so I trust they not only know what they’re doing, but have staying power. Lots of fellow Mistresses (and other adult industry types) have been flocking over there. It is free to follow and has a similar social media platform to Twitter. And there is also the premium fanclub section. I currently offer a membership at the low monthly rate of $9.99 so go sign up for free and give it a go. Then for the price of a cheap bottle of wine, you can sign up to My members site to enjoy the filthy stuff I used to post for free.

Here is My direct link: www.maitresseparisienne.com

For Dommes and any other adult performers reading this, if you sign up using this referral link, I can offer basic advice getting started.

I also send out a newsletter about once a month. Again, if censorship gets the best of the adult industry, signing up to My newsletter will be a direct way of staying in touch with My updates and musings. If you haven’t already signed up, CLICK HERE

Sessions at Chez Bellatrix

Social media is not the only place where the TOS are changing as of January 1st 2020. As I announced early in autumn, I will be changing the way I accept bookings. Deposits were already made mandatory for new clients earlier this year. But now from the new year on, the minimum session duration for new clients will be 90 minutes. No exceptions. I find one hour too rushed and I also aspire to a higher level of slaves in My world. I didn’t move to Paris to be mediocre and so I’m upping My game.

Please note: I have not decided to put My tribute up for the time being. The only change is the minimum 90 minute booking for new clients. If you are an existing regular, this will not affect you.


I have reached the 800 clip milestone on Clips for Sale and to celebrate, I am offering a Free Custom Clip to anyone who spends $75 in a single transaction. For full details, see the BLOG I wrote a little while ago.

Visit My clip studio and start binging and jerking using this special link: www.femdomroyalty.com

Auld Lang Syne

So, with all that, I look forward to seeing My long suffering slaves before the end of the year. But if you can’t visit Me at Chez Bellatrix before then, there is always My WISHLIST to show your devotion.

I’m not a Christian, but I am a Capitalist. So the phone lines will be on and I’ll be available on webcam and Skype all throughout the Christmas period.

Call Button

I thank you all for your support thorougout the years. I have a lot of huge goals for next year, especially as it will mark ten years as a Professional Dominatrix. Stick with Me lovers and losers. I’m levelling up big time for the next decade and this is a ride you will want to be part of…

Best wishes from Paris,

Lady Bellatrix

PS: a new look website is finally in the works for the new year and I can’t wait to show you all




Christmas is fast approaching with just four weeks away until the big day. As per usual, I will be available all during the festive season so now is the time to be making plans to spend your Christmas with Mistress!

As I am not currently planning on travelling away from Paris during the holiday period, perhaps you could persuade Me to change My plans. With that in mind, I am currently offering distinguished slaves the opportunity to spend Christmas with your favourite Mistress.

Christmas is often when people spend time with families but some people, like Myself cannot be with their families during the festivities. Others do not celebrate Christian holidays but find themselves with a lot of time on their hands at this time of year. Perhaps you may find yourself alone with no one to open presents with and share a glass of champagne over a candle light meal with the backdrop of something altogether more kinky. That’s where I come in…

Therefore, I’m pleased to inform you that I will be offering a special Christmas package for those who want to do something a little bit different. Think of it like a festive Femdom GFE. Either spend the day with Me here in Paris on My special Mistress for Christmas session + dinner date package, or better yet, whisk Me away to a forgeign land for an extended holiday as a private tour.

Enquire about My special Christmas packages and make this My best Christmas ever!

But if you can’t be with Me this Christmas, you can still show your appreciation by getting Me something from My WISHLIST

Best wishes from Paris,

Lady Bellatrix

PS: just a reminder, as of January 1st 2020, I will no longer offer one hour sessions

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Overnight Heavy Rubber Sessions in Paris

Heavy Rubber Dominatrix of Paris

Overnight Heavy Rubber Sessions

It’s no secret that My favourite type of sessions are Heavy Rubber. It is more than just a sexy second skin, but the transformative ambiance it creates during a scene. Recently, much to My delight, one of My regular rubber sluts inquired if we could do an overnight session. As this was something I hadn’t done before at Chez Bellatrix in Paris, I thought it could be fun.

Already dressed head to toe in latex, the session began in the evening by Me throwing him into the vac bed and hoovering him into a deep rubber submission. After he could take no more, he was dressed in a latex catsuit and hood, to match his Mistress. Being such an obedient slave, I decided to reward him by polishing My sexy latex encased ass. After several hours of Femdom games, he was thrown into the latex body bag where he was left to sleep (under My careful supervision, of course). When the morning came, he was released from the latex encasement, not before a little bit more play, then given a special drink of champagne and sent on his merry way.

After reflecting on such an intense rubber session, it made My head swirl with decadent delight. So much so, that I have decided to open My books to offer overnight heavy rubber sessions. Or for those serious rubber fetishists, a full day of latex play.

Do you think you could handle spending the night with the Heavy Rubber Dominatrix of Paris? Enquire within…

Changes in 2020

Also, this is an advance notice that I will be changing the structure of the way I session. At the time of writing, I have decided to no longer offer same day sessions to new clients. And from January 2020, I will no longer be offering one hour sessions. My rate will also be increasing. If you wish to maintain My current rate, book a session with Me now.

If you are a current, regular slave, you will not be affected by these changes.

Best wishes,

Lady Bellatrix


FOLLOW ME ON AVN STARS! www.maitresseparisienne.com

The Maitresse Parisienne returns

The Maitresse Parisienne Returns

Greetings lovers and losers,

Summer has come and gone in the blink of an eye and your favourite Maitresse Parisienne returns! I am finally catching up with life back in Paris and as I write this on a chilly autumnal evening, I am fondly reflecting the passing season.

It was wonderful to visit London for three weeks in July. I took a trip to Whiplash Towers in Hampshire and had a wonderful shoot with Mistress Nikki Whiplash. A lot of balls were busted and egos were not the only thing that was bruised. And during the heatwave, I caught up with Mistress Esme and Miss Tiffany Naylor at Blue Door Dungeon for a sweaty day of triple domination.

After that, I headed to My hometown of Vancouver on the west coast for the entire month of August to recharge My batteries. Even though I managed to spend a lot of time at Wreck Beach (which in My opinion is the best beach in the world) of course I got up to My usual Femdom antics. I spent a lot of time filming at Club Stiletto and caught up My long suffering harem of Canadian slaves. Two of them travelled over 1000 kilometres to see Me, which shows commitment!

I continue to upload three clips every Friday, Saturday and Sunday on CLIPS 4 SALE and I WANT CLIPS so the fruits of My labour will be dropping through out the cumming months.

Now that I am back at Chez Bellatrix in le Marais, I continue to offer Femdom sessions from My penthouse apartment. Same day sessions are possible if booked before noon (subject to availability). My selection of toys continues to grow and I can cater to any fantasy imaginable in My palatial chambers, but especially those of a rubbery nature.

I have big plans in Paris for next year, which will mark My ten years as a Professional Dominatrix. A lot of changes are taking place behind the scenes so My focus will be on settling in France. As such, I will not be touring any more so if you wish to see Me, it will either be at Chez Bellatrix or you can book a private tour for Me to visit your city.

One new development I can mention is that I have signed up to AVN Stars, a new adult friendly social media platform. It is free to follow, however, there is also a juicy members side where you can see all the XXX stuff that I used to post on Twitter. Yup, the day has arrived that I have gone PG-13 on Twitter, but that is a blog for another time…

Best wishes,

Lady Bellatrix

AVN STARS: www.maitresseparisienne.com

CLIPS 4 SALE: www.clips4sale.com/58975

I WANT CLIPS: www.iwantladybellatrix.com



The London Dominatrix returns

The London Dominatrix returns

Greetings lovers and losers,

Settling into Paris over the last ten months has been an amazing experince but after spending the last six years on tour constantly its time to tour again! I’m just dusting off My trusty suitcase and getting ready to head off for the summer! It’s been a while since I’ve left the confines of My penthouse apartment in Paris, so I am pleased to finally announce My only visit to London this year.

LONDON – July 10th to 26th

Returning for the first time in nearly a year, it’s time to roll out the red carpet for the Queen of Mean. From July 10th I will be offering Femdom sessions from the Blue Door Dungeon in Angel. As My time in London will be limited to two weeks an am only taking advanced bookings with a minimum of 48 hours notice and a 50% non refundable deposit will be required in advance.

On July 18th, I will be filming with Mistress Nikki Whiplash in Hampshire. Having filmed with her several times before, we are looking to do something epic this time around and envisage doing a multi-slave shoot. Full details on this can be found on a recent BLOG on My website.

On July 25th, I will also be filming with Miss Tiffany Naylor and Mistress Esme at Blue Door Dungeon in Angel, N1. As with all shoots, there will be a tribute involved and you will be required to sign a model release as well as bring a piece of government issued ID for record keeping compliances.

Best to catch Me in London this time around, as it is not likely that I will be returning again this year. That is, unless you are willing to sponsor My earlier return home!

And speaking of home, My other home (yes, I am a dual national in case you’re wondering) I will be making My way back to Vancouver for most of the month of August. I will be offering Femdom sessions from a private studio in Burnaby Mountain between August 1st to 25th. I will require 48 hours notice and a 50% non refundable deposit. Also, while there, I anticipate doing at least four shoots with Club Stiletto so if you’d like to be a film slave there, get in touch!

I wish you all a fantastic summer and hope to see you along My travels.

Best wishes from Paris,

Lady Bellatrix



Paris – now to July 8th

London – July 10th to 26th

UK Filming – with Nikki Whiplash July 18th (Hampshire)

UK Filming – with Miss Tiffany Naylor and Mistress Esme July 25th (London)

Vancouver – August 1st to 25th

Paris – beginning of September

Good Bye Paris, Hello London

Good bye Paris…hello London!

Greetings lovers and losers,

Its time to say good bye to Paris and hello to London! Now that summer is in full swing, its that time of year when everything winds down for the summer. And operations at Chez Bellatrix are no different. After spending the last ten months in one place (that is the longest I haven’t crossed a border in a decade) this chapter of My life is finally starting to take hold as a highest profile international Dominatrix in Paris.

Not touring has given Me the chance to actually settle into one place and have a routine which is actually a new way of life for Me! After months of intense French lessons, I finally feel that I am making progress in My third language. The Martial Arts classes have made Me kick My own ass and has been a great form of focus and discipline. But all of that is coming to an end this week. And with that, it is time for Me to soon take a break from My new found home for the summer.

And with that and My continued quest for Global Domination, I am pleased to announce My plans for summer touring!

PARIS – now to July 8th

The last day to session with Me at Chez Bellatrix will be July 8th. I offer sessions from a spacious penthouse apartment in the 3rd arrondissement in the historic neighbourhood of le Marais. I have a wide selection of impliments, and fetish gear but of course, My favourite items are the latex body bag and the vac bed (which seems to be more popular than ever).

So catch Me here while you can! If not, I’ll be back at the beginning of September.

LONDON – July 10th to 26th

I’m making My way back to London for the first time in almost a year! From July 10th I will be offering Femdom sessions from the Blue Door Dungeon in Angel (please note, I no longer session from Swiss Cottage, its the end of an era). As My time in London will be limited to two weeks an am only taking advanced bookings with a minimum of 24 hours notice and 50% non refundable deposit will be required.

On July 18th, I will be filming with Mistress Nikki Whiplash in Hampshire. Having shot with her several times before, we are looking to do something epic this time around and are looking to do a multi-slave shoot. For further information on that, check out this recent BLOG

On July 25th, I will also be filming with Miss Tiffany Naylor and Mistress Esme at Blue Door Dungeon in Angel, N1. As for all shoots there will be a tribute involved and you will be required to sign a model release as well as bring a piece of government issued ID for record keeping compliances. More information to follow…

VANCOUVER – August 1st to 25th

My summer wouldn’t be complete without a visit to My hometown. I can’t believe it is coming on to nearly twenty years since I witnessed My first BDSM scene! Its always good to go back to where you came from to see how far you’ve come. Once a pervert, always a pervert I guess.

So, I am pleased to announce My return dates to Vancouver will be from August 1st to 25th. And as per usual, I will be sessioning and filming from a private studio in Burnaby Mountain. I am now taking advance bookings but please note that I have a strict 48 hour notice and 50% deposit policy in Vancouver.

Although I have gotten quite sedentary while living in Paris, I am looking forward to My up coming visits to London and Vancouver. It has been a while since I have been on the road so I am really looking forward to seeing some familiar faces and meeting new ones along the way! And no, I’m not making any other pit stops along the way, so don’t bother asking (unless you’re willing to sponsor Me and pay My day rate).

If you are interested in any of the above…



Paris – now to July 8th

London – July 10th to 26th

UK Filming – with Nikki Whiplash July 18th (Hampshire)

UK Filming – with Miss Tiffany Naylor and Mistress Esme July 25th (London)

Vancouver – August 1st to 25th

Paris – beginning of September

Don’t forget to follow Me on social media and keep up to all of My crazy Femdom antics…





Hope you all have a wonderful summer and keep your kink on!

Best wishes from Paris,

Lady Bellatrix

The Cock Whisperer – One Year Chastity Challenge

The Cock Whisperer: One Year Chastity Challenge


I first met Chubby Slutty Whore back in 2014 when I used to live in Buckinghamshire. Since our first meeting, we met approximately once a year in various locations. Additionly, we’ve stayed in touch regularly via webcam on Adult Work in between, so we had already established a solid D/s relationship. He knows My quirks, and I know his kinks so one day while chatting on cam, the topic of chastity came up. As an experienced lifestyle player, CSW had already undergone legthy periods of time in chastity. So it was around last November when I got the brilliant idea to lock him up for an entire year.

Now, the idea of a one year chastity lock up may seem a little bit far fetched. I live in Paris, he lives in the UK. So how could I really know if he has being true to his word and keeping up with his continous chastity incarceration? Because I have known him a long time and trust him. While he is a total sissy bitch, he has always proven to be honest so we set up a few rules before the January 1st lock up.

As part of the One Year Chastity Challenge, My Chubby Slutty Whore had to go out and buy a special diary and make a daily entry daily being his thoughts and feelings about being under the control of The Cock Whisperer. And at the end of the year, I will take possession of this diary, which I am really looking forward to. I know it cannot always be easy and there will be some rather stressed out entries (begging to cum much CSW?) but also entries of gratitude for My attention as his Keyholder.

Here is one extract of his diary: “April 10 and the cage feels snug around Mistress Bellatrix’s property. Even though we haven’t spoken for a few days I feel connected to Her. I feel fortunate that even like this I am controlled and it is such a warm, natrual space for me to inhabit”

I have a special and top secret Chastity Mantra which only My chastity slaves are priviledged enough to learn. CSW told Me one particularly stressful day at work, his mounting frustrations were only compounded by a bulging cage. He said that day he he was tempted to take it off. So I suggested the next time, he find a quiet corner at work and repeat the mantra over and over until the feeling passed. In that sense, I become omnipresent in his life and he knows he is always being protected and watched over by a very possessive Mistress. And he is now instructed to say the mantra twenty times before bed so My ownership is the last thing he thinks about when he goes to sleep.

During this time, CSW continues to check in quite regularly on webcam. At My suggestion, CSW went out and bought a LOVENSE vibrating butt plug. Making sure it is well charged before he calls, I simply log into the app to start controlling the vibrating sensations in his mancunt when we speak. In addition to being a long term Keyholdress, it is the most powerful feeling to be lounging around Chez Bellatrix in Paris while I know he is dancing for Me like a trashy stripper on the other side of the Channel.

And now, at over 150 days, we are nearing the half way mark. On these milestone days, I sometimes allow him a little reward. What that could be is bound by Mistress confidentiality. I don’t want to give away all of My dirty little secrets! But I do feel that milestones of such an epic journey should be rewarded.

In honour of that special milestone, I created a special POV clip. The Cock Whisperer series of clips first started back in 2012 so I have really been having fun with long distance training over the years.

See all 45 clips here

So maybe you are a chastity slave who is looking for an experienced Keyholdress? Ring My hotlines now to discuss the opportunity of a lifetime!




If you want to know a little bit more about how the LOVENSE products work and how I can control your quivering mangina from near or afar, check out their website. As one of My Parisian slaves knows too well, when he takes Me out and sits across the dinner table, when I pull My phone out, he will be rather distraced througout dinner! If only they made a chastity device with built in elecrtrics, My life would be complete…

Best wishes,

Lady Bellatrix


BONDiNG on Netflix – 11 Dangerous Clichés about BDSM by a Professional Dominatrix

BONDiNG, the new Netflix mini series comes across as a light hearted piece on the day in the life of a Dominatrix. So far it seems to have been well received by the general public if their official Twitter and Instagram accounts are anything to go by. However, the Femdom community has been left seething. Not just because Mistress May is wears an ill-fitting corset and an O-ring collar (designated for a submissive) but because it was so obvious that whom ever made a programme about a Dominatrix so obviously forgot to consult a Dominatrix! By the time I finished watching the first episode, the glaring list of inaccuracies was too great to ignore so I thought it important as an experienced practitioner of BDSM to dispel some of the more blatant misconceptions found in BONDiNG.

1. That is is OK to call a sex worker who provides full service a prostitute

Peter: Do you have sex with these people?

Mistress May: No, I’m a Domme. Not a prostitute. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

(Episode 1, 02m38s)

You know what is “wrong with that”? As sex workers, we are already marginalised by society. In this day and age, there is only one socially acceptable time to use the word “prostitute” and that is when it is a technical term to define law. Sex workers are generally open minded and supportive of each other’s differences from exotic dancers, porn stars, cam girls, escorts and most other forms of the adult industry. Using the word prostitute to describe an escort who offers full sex is incredibly demeaning and further perpetuates The Whorearchy – a negative and outdated societal attitude. She might as well have spat the word “hooker” in disgust. Although it is apparent that the writers were trying to give this story a modern day, positive feminist angle with a #MeToo narrative woven within the sub-plot, they missed the mark with this slut-shaming comment. Ironic, not to mention incongruous in the following episode when Mistress May refers to herself as a “full service fetish provider” which is exactly how an escort providing light domination would describe themselves.

Indeed, Mistress May is confused. By the last eposide she says “we’re practically prostitutes”.

2. That Professional Dominatrices walk around in public in full fetish ware

Discretion is paramount to a Professional Dominatrix. After all, many of our clients demand and expect it of us and rightfully so! As practising professionals, most of us keep a very low profile about where we operate as to avoid any unnecessary attention. In a lot of cases this is to prevent being targeted by law enforcement, prevent potential altercations with disapproving members of the public or even burglary – or worse. As this series is based in New York City where Domination is technically classified as prostitution, which is technically illegal, it makes little sense that Mistress May and Peter would just strut outside the front of her dungeon night after night decked out in full BDSM regalia. The same is true about outcalls to hotels and home visits. If we were dressed in full PVC wielding a whip, no concierge would let us past the lobby. Nor would the client who asked for us for a home visit to their suburban white picket fence neighbourhood appreciate it very much.

We’re not going to show up to your hotel room in sweat pants and sneakers, but we’re not likely to show up in thigh high boots either.

3. That all of a Dominatrix’s clients are freaks and lunatics

While a lot of our practices may be seen as strange or extreme to the outside world, most of us offer a little something for every one’s tastes. Our clients come from every walk of life imaginable. From the higher echelons of society such as celebrities, politicians and multi-millionaires to the average Joe who builds houses for a living. What they all have in common is an interest in kink or fetish (whatever that may be to the individual) and an urge to act on it. A session with a Dominatrix can be cathartic and after communicating preferences and limitations, provided that the service seeker and service provider are compatible, almost anything goes! While yes, I have been involved in some bizarre scenarios and activities over the years, ultimately what the client is coming to me for is a safe and non-judgemental space to act on these fantasies as a form of escape. When the agreed time is up, they shower and leave with a smile on their face. How the series portrayed Mistress May’s clientèle to be however, was a heavy rotation of mentally deranged freaks and ill adjusted lunatics. This image is unrepresentative of the vast majority and promotes another clichéd stereotype that a Dominatrix’s clients are all misfits and could instil shame in someone who is kink-curious but hasn’t yet made the plunge.

I had one of my favourite clients, a very well adjusted professional man proof read this. He too was mortified by the show’s portrayal.

4. That Dominatrices are nasty people

In the first episode, during Carter’s first induction into a session, Mistress May starts disclosing his personal information to her client to emotionally blackmail him into participating. First of all, it would be rare that a Dominatrix would just throw someone they’re recruiting into the deep end of a session without first making sure they completely understand and consent to involvement. After all, bringing a third party into a session is a definite reflection on the Domina. But the fact that she overtly disregards the feelings or personal boundaries of the friend she enlists to act as her assistant is reckless and unnecessary. Having been a professional Dominatrix for the last nine years, I can honestly say that some of my colleagues are the most compassionate and respectful people I’ve met. OK, yes, there are a few Mistress May types buzzing around thinking it’s alright to be rude to people – these types exist in any industry. But to make us out to look like villains is outdated and frankly, pretentious.

Tearing someone down in order to big yourself up is never cool in any walk of life.

5. That anyone can become a Dominatrix to make a quick buck

Overall, this series portrays our profession as something anyone can do to make fast cash on the side. Of course, I get it. BONDiNG was only meant to be a light comedy with a bit of shock value. But trust me, to become a bonefide Dominatrix, it takes YEARS to build the skill set – both on a technical and psychological level. Not to mention, a very thick skin and willingness to grind hard. If someone with Mistress May’s lack of skills and abundance of bad manners tried this in real life, she would’t last very long.

While there is no regulated body or accreditation an aspiring Domina can gain, if she is lucky enough, she will find an experienced Domina to mentor her (but should also expect to pay for this training). Thanks to social media over the last decade, we became a small but tight knit international community, but even that takes years of hard graft to build a solid reputation. Ever since SESTA/FOSTA, a bill in America passed last year, sex work has been conflated with sex trafficking making it even more difficult to a make a living in an already highly stigmatised profession. Also with changes to regulations and algorithms on social media, most sex workers, myself included are shadow banned – or even deleted without warning. To make serious money at this racket, you will have to invest a lot of time, not to mention the tens of thousands of dollars/pounds you will spend over the years on implements, outfits, marketing and rental space.

Note to aspiring Dominas: if you’re not in it for the long haul, don’t quit your day job.

6. That its OK to abuse someone and call it BDSM

BDSM IS NOT ABUSE! It was when suppressed housewife Daphne has an intimate chat with Carter around the kitchen table then pays him to punch him in the face, that this series took a dark turn for the worse for me. Similarly, I was disgusted when Mistress May dumps a cup of scalding hot coffee on her slave’s naked torso. These are NOT acceptable forms of play in BDSM, this called is Grievous Bodily Harm (GBH) and against the law. These two shocking examples of abuse in the name of BDSM are the most damaging of all in this series. No reputable Dominant (be it male or female) would consent to do this. We have a sense of care and duty towards our clients and within our community there are two basic codes of conduct in which we practice:

SSC (Safe, Sane, Consentual) or RACK (Risk Aware Consentual Kink)

I strongly suggest you google these terms. Hell knows no one in BONDiNG did.

7. That it is OK to tie someone up in bondage and leave them

Has anyone ever heard the expression “learning the ropes”? Because it’s quite obvious no one on the production team did.

Rope bondage is a beautiful art form but also exceedingly technical facet of BDSM. One would think that a programme called BONDiNG would at least put the actors through basic rope training or teach them a few rudimentary knots. This part of the series lacks integrity and from my point of view looks rushed and simply glazed over. Its as if they threw a rope at the actress and said “here, just tie him up”. Bad bondage can result in nerve damage and in extreme cases this can be permanent. On most occasions, Mistress May uses sloppy rope work but also leaves Carter to fend for himself while another time, Carter ties the rope around her neck like a noose.

Leaving someone unattended during rope bondage is not only irresponsible, it can have serious consequences. Not only physically but mentally as well. For anyone new to this but interested, there are a lot of resources out there on safety and I strongly suggest you read up on it before engaging. Why the creators of this programme didn’t think of that beggars belief.

As someone who has seen what bad bondage can do, this left my skin crawling. Play it safe!

8. That Dominatrices are irresponsible and don’t care about our clients’ safety

When a client comes to a Dominatrix, in most cases it is to relinquish control within agreed parameters. As such, most clients need to feel safe and that they can trust the person they are submitting to. Hygiene is an important factor, as is discretion which I’ve already mentioned. Some of the more cringe worthy omissions of this is when she ignores the safe word and the client falls off the bondage bench with a rope dangling around his neck. Also as mentioned above, lack of knowledge with rope work then abandoning the person left in her care.

These are a just a few examples where the Dominatrix is portrayed as reckless and irresponsible. We are not all walking around in a narcissistic bubble of angst looking to take our frustrations out on the next male we encounter. Over the years, I have built long term D/s relationships with some of my clients and although I make some of them bleed and others cry, I can honestly say that I love my subjects and feel very maternal towards them. Everything I do is done within agreed boundaries and more importantly the use of the “SAFE WORD” is there for a reason.

We do care, we are responsible and that’s why we disapprove of this misrepresentation.

9. That being rude makes one Dominant

Being rude doesn’t make one Dominant. Being arrogant does not make one Dominant. Yelling and dropping the F-bomb every five minutes does not make one Dominant. Idle threats, emotional blackmail and temper tantrums don’t make one Dominant.

Being comfortable in your own skin and knowing that your submissive trusts you to completely take control makes one Dominant. Knowing your craft and having the confidence to pull it off makes one Dominant. Pushing boundaries but respecting limitations makes one Dominant.

A true Dominatrix understands that without a submissive, we have no one to Dominate.

10. That anyone can hire a Dominatrix as a surprise for someone else

Mistress May has a consultation with upper class housewife Daphne to fulfil one of her husband’s fantasies. Let’s stop right there. We need to talk about consent and boundaries again. How can a Dominatrix truly understand if the third party involved is being coerced? How can she understand if this is something the third party would agree to? What a nasty surprise it could be if this was real life, rather than fiction. Most Dominatrices I know, myself included don’t do house calls (unless they feel safe to do so) let alone to force themselves on an unsuspecting spouse. Consent, as mentioned previously, is the cornerstone to our operations and not something we take lightly. In the past I have been contacted to “surprise” an unsuspecting groom at his stag/bachelor party by someone who wanted Me to tie him be to a chair and whip him. Dominatrices are not novelties. Nor are we completely void of morals.

No, you can’t hire Me to pop out of a cake in a latex catsuit and whip your little brother for his birthday.

11. That all Dominatrices are angry bitches

Generally speaking, not true. But after watching BONDiNG, as a community, we certainly are now.

We are not all man hating extreme feminists with daddy issues. But Rightor Doyle and his team at Netflix best believe that they have stirred up the hornet’s nest.

Lady Bellatrix is a professional British Dominatrix now residing in Paris, France. She has a media background both as a columnist and in television.

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PHOTO: courtesy of Netflix

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